The Best-Laid Plans Often Go Awry

Remember last summer? I decided early on that I wanted to make the most of our gorgeous Colorado summer months and do things. So we did. All kinds of events and ideas were penciled in on our calendar, and week by week, as we did them, we checked them off our list. It was wonderful. Doing takes planning, and planning takes effort. If you never plan, you never do. That was the lesson of Moore Summer 2011. :-)

A couple of months ago, in April, Ryan asked if I thought we could make a trip to Yellowstone work this year. He has wanted to do this for a long time; we have such amazing memories of going  there when we lived in Montana, and Ryley would absolutely love it. So we looked at the money situation and what it would require, and we decided that the only way we could afford it was if we pinched every single penny for two months and then camped. But a plan was a plan! We requested the vacation time and began to live as frugally as we could. The excitement was building.

I also started trying to plan other things for the summer too…like our garage sale, which we’ve wanted to do for the last five years. I scheduled that for May 19 and began to envision the squeaky clean garage that we would have all summer long after either selling or donating everything in it. I looked up children’s theater dates and times and penciled in shows (not because we were going for sure, but so that we wouldn’t forget they were happening). I looked up our city calendar of events and penciled more things in. But then I started to stress out a little bit.

There’s not enough weekends for the list of things I want to do this summer!!!! Oh no!

But then things started happening to show me that I’m not really the one in control. Ryan had to work a special event on May 19, so we rescheduled our garage sale for June 9. Then, we needed to go to a memorial service on June 9, so we rescheduled the garage sale for June 30.

Then last week, Ryan’s dad got sick and needed an emergency triple bypass surgery on his heart. It all happened so suddenly, and there was no time for Ryan to fly to Florida before the procedure. Even though it was risky, we were all pretty confident that Ron would come through it okay. We kept thinking that of course we could continue with our plans to go camping in Yellowstone; the trip was scheduled a full week and a half after the surgery, after all, and he would be recovered and headed home to take it easy by that time.

Except that he didn’t really wake up after surgery. And he still hasn’t woken up, a week and a half later.

Even through last weekend, we were completely planning on the trip. Maybe we were in denial as to how serious the situation was. Going to Yellowstone was a sign that everything was all right with Ryan’s dad. So we set up our tent in the backyard to air it out, and we started a “Yellowstone pile” in our living room, where we began tossing flashlights, binoculars, batteries, sleeping bags, etc., as we came across them.

But by Monday night, we were slowly realizing that it wasn’t all right. It was far from all right.

By Tuesday, it was a pretty clear-cut decision. Ryan needed to go to Florida to be with his dad, stepmom, and family. With a heavy heart, I called and canceled our camping reservation and the dog-boarding reservation. I moved all our camping gear back into the extremely stuffed garage and vacuumed up the grime it left on our living room floor. I did it while Ryan was at work, so as to lessen the amount of pressure and stress he was under.

Yellowstone will always be there. Ryan’s dad will not.

Ryley was extremely disappointed.

“I am sad about Grandpa, I am sad about Daddy leaving, and I am sad about Yellowstone! Look at that picture of our family…We were so happy then!” she wailed.

So melodramatic.

Even tonight, she asked, “So if we had gone to Yellowstone today like we planned, would we be to our campsite yet?” She wasn’t mourning the loss of the trip; she was just matter-of-fact about it.

I looked at the clock. “Yes, I guess so. But Daddy’s where he’s supposed to be right now.”

“I know,” she answered. And she does know. She loves her grandpa so very much.

The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry.

My aunt asked me today is the garage sale is still on for next weekend. I laughed. :-) I don’t think we’ll be making “plans” for awhile. I think God is using these situations to teach me to relax a little bit and do things in His timeline, not mine.

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Here are some pictures of the last couple of weeks:

Ryley and Amirah camped out in the backyard.

On Saturday we went to Bass Pro, and there were all these free activities kids could participate in. Ryley was pretty psyched about archery.

Also, guns. That there is a Red Ryder BB gun. She is asking for a pink one for her birthday. Yeah, right. :-)

We kinda had some Father’s Day fun that day.

Ryley attended a basketball camp this week that her daycare lady took her to. She really enjoyed it, but she was discouraged because kids kept yelling stuff at her, and she felt like she was doing things wrong.

“What are they yelling?” I asked.

“Stuff like ‘traveling! Traveling!’ I don’t even know what that means.”

“Oh. Well, when you have the ball and you’re walking or running with it, you have to keep bouncing it. You can’t just carry it.”

“Oh!!!!!! That makes so much sense now!”

:-)

General silliness….

Last night, our first night Ryan was away, I decided to take Ryley to our suburb’s big band/swing concert in the park to get her mind off of everything…

We sat there and read for an hour together. It was really nice.

If you would, please continue to keep Ryan’s dad in prayer. We are praying that tomorrow (Saturday) will be the day he wakes up from his comatose state. He had a tracheotomy done today, which they are hopeful will help. Please keep his stepmom and sisters in prayer too, as they have spent the last 10 days down there, and it’s been very draining and stressful. They are all heading home tomorrow while Ryan stays.

Thank you bunches. :-) Nothing is impossible with God.

Happy Father’s Day!

Ryley and I are pretty lucky girls to have such amazing daddies and grandpas!

I have always been a daddy’s girl. I am a lot like my dad in so many ways. But I am just so thankful for his presence in my life…for his gentleness yet firmness, his eternal optimism, his godly wisdom, and his unwavering faith in God. I love you so much, Daddy!!! Happy Father’s Day!!!

This is my favorite picture of my parents!!!

Ryley loves her Pappaw so much!

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Also, Happy Father’s Day to my father-in-law Ron! I am grateful for his godly example too, and for the wonderful way he raised Ryan! 

 

Ryley loves her Grandpa too. He’s her science buddy.

Ron is still in ICU following his triple coronary bypass surgery on Wednesday. Please continue to lift him up in prayer! 

Both of our dads are amazing prayer warriors, and we cannot thank them enough for the prayer cover over our lives. It’s invaluable to us!

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And last but not least, Happy Father’s Day to my amazing husband Ryan.

I have to tell you that back when we were in high school, I used to watch the way Ryan interacted with younger kids, and it really impressed me. I always, always knew he would be a really good daddy.  Then, when we were dating, in college, I visited his family in Florida, and we played lots of board games with his siblings. I watched the way he good-naturedly teased his brother and sisters over a game of Clue, and that was the moment that I knew I wanted him to be the father of my children.

Thank you, sweetie, for everything you do for us! You are the most incredible daddy for our Ryley girl, and we love you sooooo much!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Father’s Day!

Something Happy

My mom (who is an infinitely better sight-reader than I am!) played the duet part to one of Ryley’s lesson songs when she was here this past weekend. It was so sweet! I couldn’t resist posting this sweet video of the two of them.

“I Gave My Life for Thee”…

On another wonderful note, Ryan’s dad came through triple bypass heart surgery today and is doing as well as can be expected! Praise God! When I hear the details of what a bypass is, I am still so amazed that this technology actually exists! :-)

Thank you so much for the prayers; Ryan and I felt God’s unexplainable peace all day long. Ron will still need a lot of prayer in the hours, days, and weeks ahead.

XOXO

Summer (and a prayer request)

Summer is in full swing! At last! At last!

Ryley started the long-awaited (and controversial!) guitar lessons a couple of weekends ago…

She loves it!

That very same day, she went horseback riding with her Girl Scout troop.

It was her very first time on a horse. She is insistent that ponies don’t count!

The outing was filled with all kinds of drama (as Girl Scout events usually go). We were delayed by a major rainstorm, so we had Brownies bouncing around in the back of our van for two hours while we waited for it to blow over. Then Ryley’s best friend came down with the worst allergic reaction (to mosquitoes, we think) that I have ever witnessed. But the girls still had fun.

Then, that same evening, my mom arrived in town! She was a God-send, as she was planning to take Ryley to Nebraska for a week so that we wouldn’t have any more office misadventures, like this:

Fun with shredders…

Fun with paper and scissors…

Fun with everything else…

I love my little girl to pieces, but honestly, having her in my office is pure mayhem. She’s very difficult to contain in that environment for more than a couple hours.

So anyway, my mom came on Saturday night, and on Sunday we headed to the mountains so she could get her mountain fix…

Lake Evergreen

It was such a lovely day!

It is striking me more and more what a big girl Ryley is becoming!

My mom and Ryley headed to my grandma’s house in Nebraska on Monday morning. They had such a wonderful time, and Ryley only got home-sick (crying) once, which is a big sign of maturity for her.

While they were gone, Denver received the hailstorm that roofing companies like mine have been waiting three years for. The very next day was insane at my office. It’s been a couple of years since I’ve felt that oh-so-familiar sense of panic when I’ve looked at my desk at the stacks of stuff needed to be done before the end of the day.  And as the day wore on, I began to become more and more depressed about my life/vocation as an office manager of a roofing company.

Do I have it in me to do one more storm? To manage our goal of $1,000,000 of business in four months?

Everyone else was excited. Woohoo! Roofing! All I felt was regret. I feel like I’ve wasted all the time in the last two years that it wasn't insanely busy. I wasted my off time with TV and housecleaning when I should have been using my available off-hours energy for reading and writing. I should have read more books. I should have written a book.

This storm completely changes the way I view the summer ahead. I had been picturing productive but non-stressful days at work, followed by restful evenings of activities and family time, with occasional freelance writing assignments. Now the landscape of my time has changed.  I see more and more stress and less and less writing. More time of my life being wasted and going down the tubes.

Don’t get me wrong. I am grateful for my job. But it’s not rocket science to understand that working for a roofing company isn’t my dream job. :-)  I try to make myself think positively; I try to believe that my keen mind and quick organizational skills and good memory are being utilized. Here I’ve been praying for opportunities that are more along the line of my giftings, and maybe since God sent the storm, this is His way of using some of my giftings (some of my lesser-known, more boring ones!). Maybe He's requiring me to work hard so I can generate much-needed additional income for my family so that at last we can have enough breathing room for me to really look into other opportunities down the line. This storm certainly didn’t surprise God, even though it completely threw me off “my plan.”  Ha ha. I don’t know. But I do know that I’m to do my work as unto the Lord and to do it with all my heart.

I have bad memories of Storm Season 2009...of leaving the office in tears...of sitting at my desk feeling like I was literally drowning...of picking up Ryley at daycare and heading back to the office to work until 7 or 8:00.

Do I have it in me to do one more storm?

One day at a time.

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So my mom is back home now, and life is settling into a summer rhythm. Ryley is in daycare at a lady’s home three days a week, and we’ve adjusted Ryan’s schedule to be home with her two days and then work evening shifts.

Ryley is obsessed with reading “The Sisters Grimm” series, which is actually pretty adorable and fun. She is also learning to cross-stitch, which she picked up a lot faster than I had anticipated…

His and hers….

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If you could, please be in prayer for Ryan’s dad Ron, who is undergoing a double bypass heart surgery tomorrow morning. It is weighing heavily on our hearts and minds, as heart bypasses are always an extremely risky procedure, and this case is no exception. Please pray for wisdom and clarity of mind for the surgeons, for God’s peace to cover Ron, Linda, and all of his children and grandchildren, and for success.

We would really, really appreciate it. :-)

Memorial Day Ramblings

I decided this morning that if I don’t just sit down and write what’s in my head, then it’s just never going to happen. I always try to wait to blog until the house is clean, but I’m in the mood to write now and I may not be after cleaning the bathroom sucks the creative life from me.

Ryan is working this entire weekend, so Ryley and I have been doing girl things. We went to a farmer’s market on Saturday morning, and the place just smelled like summer in Colorado. Yay!

 

We planted petunias in the front, then tomatoes, strawberries, blueberries, cilantro, and jalapenos in elevated, hopefully-dog-proof pots in the backyard. I call it my “pot garden,” but Ryan warns that I should be careful using that terminology. :-)

We also re-potted one of my indoor peace lilies, and it is amazing how tall it’s grown in its new habitat, just 24 hours later!

It’s funny because we’ve planted gardens before, but this year, Ryley is so involved. She insists that watering everything is now her responsibility. I don’t mind. If she actually keeps up this enthusiasm, maybe we'll actually have something to show for it this year.

And apparently, we don’t make cookies from scratch nearly often enough. As we were melting butter and cracking eggs, etc., Ryley opens the fridge and says, “Ok….now where is the cookie dough?”

“What are you looking for?”

“The cookie dough.”

“Ryley, we’re making the dough. Right now.”

“Ohhhhh!”

There are so many things like that recently…things she’s forgotten. Here I think we’re giving her all these wonderful memorable experiences, but year after year, we discover that there are things that have been lost in her growing brain. I hope that they’re still in there somewhere…that subconsciously, the happy things we’ve done are still there, affecting her personality, even though she doesn’t remember them. :-) And, I guess we just get to do them again!

I’m glad we went to DisneyWorld when she was five, when she was still young enough to believe in the magic of princesses (she announced this morning that she’s definitely over fairies, but she secretly likes princesses so her friends won’t make fun of her). But now we’ll just have to go again someday, so she can really remember it and enjoy it from an older kid’s perspective!

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She’s going through this amazing “helper” phase right now, where she likes to help with laundry and cooking. She calls it “learning to be a housewife.”

“Hey, Ryley, do want to help me be a housewife?”

“Sure!”

“Can you please take the clothes in the washer and put them in the dryer?”

“Yep!”

It’s wonderful. She even started a load of towels for me the other day, while I shouted out step-by-step instructions from upstairs.

She also feels very empowered in the kitchen suddenly. Her current thing is making pudding. She read the instructions on the box and did it all herself, without me even knowing until I found the chocolaty whisk and mixing bowl in the sink. She is proud that she came up with her own “method,” whipping it for two minutes more than the box recommends. :-) Ryan told her it tasted so good…almost like it was “extra-whipped”…. She just beamed at the compliment.

I’m trying to be more present with her. I had a long list of things I wanted to get done around the house this weekend, like clean out our office, go through a couple closets, and organize all my boxes of piano sheet music and books. But yesterday Ryley came to me and asked me if I could help her create an awesome house for her Sims family on the computer (she has been grounded from TV and computer games for the past month because of the behavior issues at school), and I amazed myself by saying yes. I think it amazed her too! So we sat in the cluttered office for two hours, creating a house on her computer game, and she clung to my neck the entire time. She was almost giddy that Mommy was actually playing on the computer with her. It meant a lot.

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Last weekend, on a rainy Saturday, Ryley accompanied Ryan and helped him pass out salads and coupons at a 5k race at Children’s Hospital….

They had a blast! Good daddy-daughter time.

Then, on Wednesday, her class had a Mad-Hatter tea party, where they were supposed to bring and wear a crazy hat. We realized that we had given away the crazy hat she was planning on wearing at last Christmas’s white elephant exchange, so Ryan went out and found this one to surprise her:

Such a good daddy!

Friday was the last day of school. Thank You, Jesus! :-) At her class “awards ceremony,” Ryley won “Most Inquisitive,” which is absolutely her to a tee. Sometimes her questions are quite odd…

While gardening… “How do they get the soil into these bags?” and “What do bees eat? Do they eat the honey they make?” Especially with science, which is not my strong suit, I find myself saying, “I don’t know, sweetie. We’ll have to look it up.” The questions are incessant. Her poor teachers! Haha.

Ryan accompanied her on her field day on Friday. He was the lone parent volunteer for her class. They had a good time, and he learned a lot about her teachers and little friends. Funny how you always wish you could learn this stuff before the last day of school. :-)

Yay!!!

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Yesterday our church had a children’s carnival after the service:

I was thinking recently that Ryley doesn’t have a lot of Christian friends. Our church is young and still quite small, and I don’t think there are any girls her age. There are some older and some younger, but none within the 7-9 age range that I can think of. So I’ve been trying to think of ways to foster some good relationships with other Christian girls.

Regardless, we went to the carnival for some fun and Christian fellowship.

Full disclosure here: I can be painfully, annoyingly shy. We don’t have a lot of friends at our church yet, so I was really nervous about going to the carnival alone, without Ryan. I even offered to help this week’s Sunday School teachers clean up the trash pit of a classroom after the service, just to minimize the amount of time I would have to stand awkwardly at the carnival. I think they were confused by my offer. :-) Anyway, I finally got out to the carnival, and everybody was already paired off….ladies with no children standing talking, ladies with newborns in strollers standing talking, wealthier couples with “tween” kids standing talking about business, and me, disgusted with my own shyness, floating awkwardly between following Ryley around and trying to strike up a pointless conversation with a new lady who seemed distracted. I’m not good at just walking up to people and joining conversations already in progress. The couple of families that we do know better were not there.

My parents (who celebrated 39 years of marriage yesterday!!) have close friends in every state they’ve ever lived in…friends they can go to lunch with after church, friends that feel comfortable falling asleep on their couch on Sunday afternoons. We have few friends like that. We have lots of acquaintances, but few close friends, and it’s probably because we’re both so shy in public situations. I hope it doesn’t come across as snotty. Anyway, it’s something for us to work on, for sure!  It takes time to develop good friendships. And I’m praying that some families with girls Ryley’s age will start coming to our church.

Anyway, it was really interesting, because after we left the carnival, Ryley and I went to eat lunch at a Noodles down the street, and we were sitting on the patio finishing our meal when a couple from our church parked and walked up and said they were trying Noodles based on a recommendation from Ryan last Sunday. It was so cool! They are probably my parents’ age, and I don’t even remember their names, but we had a friendly conversation right there on the patio, and I was able to give them a BOGO coupon I had, which they were really excited about. I think God used the situation to encourage me. :-) We’ll just keep being friendly.

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Lastly, here are some foods we’re enjoying right now…

Roasted garbanzo beans…

Homemade sweet potato fries with garlic, thyme, and olive oil…

More portabella mushroom pizzas:

And there’s no picture, but today we are making our new favorite, BBQ pork in a crock pot. We rub a pork shoulder with BBQ rib rub and put it in a crock pot with kosher salt, pepper, minced garlic, a coarsely-chopped onion, liquid smoke, and root beer. Cook on low for 8-10 hours, drain and shred it, mix with Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ sauce, and serve on buns. Oh my goodness, it’s delicious! And it smells so good right now!

Thanks for sticking with me through this long, detached, random post. And now that the writing bug is finally out of my system, I am off to tackle the house-cleaning.

Happy Memorial Day!