Whatever Your Hand Finds to Do....

There simply aren't words for the amount of pressure I've been under at work recently. I know. I work for a roofing company...a line of work not necessarily known for stressful times. But nonetheless, as a result of our consistently tumultuous hail season and the fact that our office moved locations right in the middle of it, I would say that the last three to four weeks have been the most insane that I've ever endured in my career.

I've vented to Ryan, to my parents, and to God. Time and time again, words fail me, and the words I am speaking when I attempt to describe my frustrations do not accurately represent or express the terror I feel when I sit at my desk, drowning.

I have always been good at putting things in perspective. Last week, Leahh and I both went home in tears after putting in long hours. The next night, as we locked up the office, I turned to her and said, "Remember. No crying tonight. They're just roofs." In light of eternity, in light of the fact that God is aware of every molecule in the universe, in the insignificant happenings within the lives of each sparrow and minnow, the issues we deal with are fairly small. A 30-square roof is a small thing in comparison to how big my God is. I know this.

Even so, the problems don't disappear. The work still has to be done/squeezed in within the allotted time. The issues and difficult people still have to be dealt with. The balance between having a demanding career and being a good mom still has to be struck somehow. Even now, as I write, I feel like I am not fully capturing the depth and intensity of the amount of work to be accomplished, the need for my mind to be multi-faceted every given second of the day, or of the pressure on me alone to oversee it and make this all happen successfully. There are no words.

I've started trying to get to the office a bit earlier, before anybody else is there, just so I can pray....so I can ask God to fill that place with His Spirit and with His presence...to help each of us with our attitudes...to help each of us have wisdom when prioritizing so we are able to work efficiently. I put on the Armor of God. I pray, pray, and pray.

And (probably) to the disagreement of my co-workers, I play my Kari Jobe and Leeland CDs, over and over and over again. Because God inhabits the praises of His people. And more than anything, I need to keep praising God in the midst of my circumstances. I need His presence with me, minute after minute.

I am thankful for my job. I am thankful that, in this economy, we both have incomes that pay our bills. Ryan and I were discussing the other night how we rarely make the connection that the ability to sit here in a comfy home and type on my nice laptop and the ability to go to our cushy bed at night (complaining about our stressful days, on our way!) is a direct result of the hard work we put in during the daytime. I can pay for dinner at Noodles and Co. because I worked nine hours today. If we did away with the work, we'd have to do away with the comfort.

I also realize that it is all due to the extreme goodness of God, who blesses us and provides for us, even when we least deserve it.

So last night, after our walk, Ryan and I collapsed on the couch. We had both put in full, hard days, taken Ryley to swimming lessons, and I had taught three piano lessons in the evening as well. We each vented (as best as we could) to the best friend/partner God has so graciously given each of us, in good times and in bad. And then, in a salute to the old, carefree Ryan-and-Joy days, we pulled out a couple of board games and played...our child snug in her bed, our puppy content at our feet, our clean laundry still in baskets, our families safe and healthy, our God securely on His throne.

And it was absolutely wonderful.